It’s been awhile since I’ve added to this continuing series. Have I been lazy? Bitter? Jaded? Tired? Yes! Click here for Part One and Part Two.
If you receive incorrect change whether via a cashier or a “check your own damn self out” terminal, remember your manners.. Do not yell “WRONG!” or “This machine f***ed me” (Really? That would be painful.) or “You dumb bitch, you gave me the wrong change.” Instead, say, “I’m sorry, but you gave me incorrect change.” or “The machine seems to have given me an incorrect amount of change.” If your cashier doesn’t count back your change to you, stand and count it before you walk away. Once you walk away, management assumes you are lying. If you don’t immediately count your money, or even if you do, be prepared to wait while the drawer is counted, the security tape is reviewed, etc. Don’t take this out on the cashier. Do you know how many people have lied to her in the past? She won’t risk your job for you.
If you don’t like “check-your-own-damn-self-out” don’t use it! Don’t complain to the attendant that you don’t like the way it works or the computer’s voice. They have no control over that. If you think that these terminals have “took our jobs” and put people out of work… then don’t use them. (This is a lame excuse. In my store, “check-yourself” added two jobs. Plus, over 3,000 people have been hired and fired or quit since I started 4 years ago. Yes, that’s 3,000! If you want a job at Big Box Store, they are always hiring!)
If you have never used a “check-your-own-damn-self-out”, don’t expect that you can come up to one on a busy Saturday afternoon and ask the attendant to stand next to you and explain to you in minutia how to use it. (Even if you have two hooks for hands! True story!) If you don’t want to lift heavy items or scan 20 of the same candle, don’t come to “check-yourself”. If you don’t want to type in the PLU or look up your produce, weigh it or put in the quantity, don’t come to “check-yourself”. (So many people get stumped when the computer asks for quantity. It should say “how many f***ing things do you have?” These people would understand that language.) This is probably wrong and un-PC but if you are handicapped to the point where you cannot reach the touch screen, pick up your items and, basically, check your self out, don’t come through the “check-your-own-damn-self-out“! If you want a person to unload your cart, ring up your items, bag them, and put them in your cart – go to a cashier!
Why do you bring expired coupons or coupons for a different size/scent/type and try to convince me to take it? This coupon expired 2 months ago. Not gonna take it. Period. This coupon is for $1.00 off full size body wash. You have the 97ยข travel size which the coupon specifically excludes. Nice try, but no. Don’t argue, you know you’re a coupon scammer. Also, don’t flip out when I tear up your expired or photocopied coupons. I’m just trying to save (yes) my competitors from your BS.
If you think someone has cut ahead ahead of you in line, don’t throw a third grade hissy fit. Maybe they did, maybe they didn’t. Be the bigger person and let it go. In today’s case, a lady thought that the “self-check” line was like a bank line. You wait until one becomes free. No, it’s every man for themselves. So, the lady who was waiting for a free check out stepped up and the woman waiting for that terminal freaked out! They were screaming at each other about who was right and how the line worked. Even the woman’s kids got in on it, “Stop screaming at my mommy!” (Yes, woman #2 had three kids with her.) After the first woman rang up and paid for her three items, the second woman rang up and paid for 44 items. She paid her $58 total with one dollar bills. One at a time. Do you see where I am going with this example? Even if the first woman was right (and she wasn’t), courtesy, the number of items in your order, the method with which you are going to pay and the fact that you have your kids with you should lead you to shut your whiny ass baby f***ing mouth and let the other person go ahead of you. Damn!
